Should one go see 50 Shades Freed?

You are tired of hearing about Christian Grey and Anastasia Steel since the publication of the first book by E.L James in 2012? Stay tuned, 50 Shades Freed is the last instalment of the torrid saga adapted for the cinema by James Foley! And what if this last screen adaptation was more enticing that it seems. Take the test: the reasons to go see … and not see this film.

• You are already an adept of the love story between Anastasia and Christian. Not only will you not be deceived by this last instalment, but it might become your favourite film amongst the three. The film begins with the wedding of Anastasia Steele, who becomes the director of a publishing house and millionaire Christian Grey. It continues with their perfect honeymoon in France, and their move into a house big enough for a (very) large family. The dark shadow of this idyllic story? Jack Hyde, former boss of Anastasia, green with jealousy that his underling has taken over his job. Eager to take his revenge, he does everything to make Anastasia and Christian’s life pure hell. The film’s buildup is very well done, the sound track right on target, the characters have lost none of their peps and there are many funny lines. Cherry on the cake: Christian unveils himself and even sheds a tear!
• You enjoy corny romantic films. Well this film keeps the same promise as the book: emptying your head and spending a good moment. Prepare yourself to enter in the idyllic world of the handsome rich couple with many houses, private jets and other costly items, and think of nothing else than their torrid kisses and the multiple nicely daring scenes (yes the BDSM of the previous instalments is gently replaced by softer eroticism), even if vibromassagers and anal plugs are part of the props). Those who cannot resist the rippling muscles of Jamie Dornan (aka Christian Grey) will willingly slip into the skin of the lovely Dakota Johnson (aka Anastasia Steele) because in this latest instalment, they are both very often… naked.

• You don’t like corny love stories. Unless you enjoy torturing yourself or laugh about your phobias, this film is not for you. The honeymoon of Anastasia and Christian in Paris and on the Riviera ticks all the boxes of kitsch (private jet, yacht,…), the lovebirds kiss about thirteen times per minute, and there are no less than eight scenes of perfect love making, while the singing and piano playing talents of the handsome Christian push the cliché to howling laughter. No need to add that the possessive macho side of Christian who does not want his beauty to work, go out nor see friends without him is also part of the picture. So don’t say we did not warn you!
• Your are seeking a Lars Von Trier style of eroticism. If the pretty breasts of Dakota Johnson are still part of the picture as well as a few pubic hairs of Jamie Dornan, and one watches a scene of intercourse that revolves around ice cream, the sex scenes are nicer, even more run of the mill than in the previous instalments.
• In bed, as in life, daily routine changes radically the life of the former SM master and his submissive student, which is really too bad. Between office talk, debates on the evening menu or discussions regarding the construction details of their new house, we fear that evenings will soon turn into Scrabble games rather than torrid lovemaking in Christian’s playroom.